Everything Happens for a Riesling

“Oh, one last trip before you head out, that’s nice!” multiple people said about our September road trip to see the Passion Play. Here I would roll my eyes at Chris. If only that were our last trip before we head out! But no, Chris saw days off on the school calendar and I believe his exact words were, “I don’t want to leave any time on the table!” This is the same man who said to me in Provence the week after I had covid, “I didn’t come to Provence to read a book by the pool!” ….what? Who is this person, and how did we end up married? That is exactly what I go on vacation to do…? “It’s not a vacation, Mari, it’s a trip.” Oh, my mistake.

Oops, now Chris is mad. I meant to say… um… we enjoyed the Loire Valley so much last Columbus Day break that we decided to do our same favorite things—castles, water, autumn wine tasting—along the Rhine River in Germany for this Columbus Day weekend too.

Barge and in Charge

We stayed across the river from St. Goar’s Rheinfels Castle. The full moon hung over Katz Castle as we ferried back across the river after an afternoon visit to the castle, followed by dinner of venison and spaetzle. Mist hung thick over the river in the morning; a little duck family paddled about the banks. The river boat finally pulled up and we climbed up to the sundeck playground for three hours of drinking coffee and watching Riesling vineyards and castles slide by the green river. The mists lifted, turned into a sparkling haze, then disappeared altogether as we rounded the famous Loreley.

“This looks like an enchanted forest!” Eloise observed, watching the shore.

The Rhine is a main transportation hub between Basel, Switzerland and the North Sea in Rotterdam, the Netherlands. Sailors used to tell tales of the seven maidens—dangerous rocks hovering around the surface—and the mysterious Loreley Siren who sang sailors to their watery deaths. Before modern controls tamed the river, a high cliff and a fast, narrow neck of water just below the maidens combined to make a murmuring, gurgling sound, sometimes accompanied by a whirlpool. Clearly this was siren territory! Legends tell of a king trying to avenge his son (who died here) by sending out an expedition searching for the lethal woman. We had no trouble on our voyage, passing the cliffs and the mermaid statue of the siren in what peace we could find with the kids diving headfirst down a toddler slide.

POP! A champagne cork launched over the side, bobbing merrily down the river as a couple nearby filled their flutes. The boat menu listed “sailor sausages” for lunch, which made Chris grimace, but we ordered some anyway with tasty German mustard.

We disembarked in Rudsheim, walked around a bit, took a ferry across the river, walked a loooooong way to the train station, missed the train because the ticket machine only took cash and we tried to pay with a credit card and missed it during that brief transaction, then caught the next train to Bacharach. At this point, everyone was very grouchy. We’d been walking directly into the sun for over an hour, we were out of water, and the whole benefit of living in Europe is that you don’t have to figure out trains for the first time on vacation. Ugh, it was like we’d never done this before.

The Bicker Point

This is the point in the day when we’ve had a lot of fun but it can’t last forever. This is usually shortly before dinner. At home, we would be sitting, having tea time and doing homework or chatting. On vacation, we’re usually tired out and still trudging along. During port calls, this would usually happen the second-to-last day, sort of the “shortly before dinner” of a 4-5 day port visit, when it’s been so nice to be together again but you realize the trip you’ve been looking forward to is almost over and you’re sad.

Bacharach

Then we arrived in Bacharach. This town still has a bunch of Roman watchtowers around it, plus vineyards everywhere. It is of course named after Bacchus, the Roman god of agriculture, wine, drama and revelry. It is so very cute, and is also featured on the 2019 Rick Steve’s Germany cover. If I came to the Rhine River again, I would stay here! We had dinner in the cutest wine courtyard. The flatbread the kids ordered for dinner ended up being a large, very tasty apple cinnamon tarte. It was really good. Chris and I had soup, cheese, and wine grown on the hills around us. This was a really fun dinner. The kids were happy and silly and kept cracking Chris and me up. The earlier Bicker Point was forgotten, and we caught the train and ferry back to our airbnb with no further issues.

The next day, we woke up happy to be heading home! First on the agenda: The Loreley Bob, a summer toboggan slide. It clocks your speed; Isaac won! We went down many times. It was fun. Eloise was pumped to get to go on her own.

Koblenz

From there, we drove along the Rhine up to Koblenz to see the statue to German unification. This was a great stop—there’s a basilica built atop Roman ruins right there, a lovely outdoor café along the divergence of the Rhine and Mosel rivers, a big monument, gondolas swinging across the river to a fortress, and—this is the kids’ favorite part—a big water feature full of damns and levees you can move to manipulate the water pouring off one end all the way down to the swirling drain. Isaac was born to be a water engineer. This has always always always been his most favorite thing to do. It was great. The kids got soaked, but the autumn sunshine was warm and soft, even as golden leaves rained down around the basilica.

Eltz Castle

It was a short drive along the charming Mosel River to our final stop of the day: the incomparable Eltz Castle. It is the most castle-y castle I’ve ever seen. Through positioning and alliances, it has never been conquered and is still privately owned. Looking out from the high stone walls I felt the most acute sense of covetousness I’ve ever felt for something so absurdly out of reach. If there was any way I could buy that castle and live there, I totally would. Chris completely agreed. The kids also. There; it’s decided. We will move in asap.

The castle had treasures in gold, silver, gems and ancient and rare materials IN A TREASURY. It had legit suits of armor and tapestries. It had an inner courtyard, spires, grounds, a bridge, lookouts. The owners still live there. It was powerfully cool.

In the end, I’m glad we squeaked out another Germany jaunt. We felt pretty relaxed afterwards and were able to have some space to have some nice chats about moving and dreams of Sicily. I guess everything really does happen for a Riesling.